The Ink-redibles

So, after a brief hiatus, I am now ready to dedicate my every waking moment to bringing you Part 2 of my Kerner/Rorschach Tribute Haiku Series. I struggled a bit with this one but my recently begun mission to re-watch every X-Files episode has been a source of useful inspiration here. I am sure Spielberg and Cameron will be fighting over the rights to this…

No. 6

Rorschach blot 06.jpg

Movie poster for:

‘Skinny Alien Sheriff

and Flying Rabbit’



Breakfasts should be seasoned not herbed…

I don’t want herbs on my breakfast 

It’s something that should not be done 

No garnish is needed upon bacon bap

(or muffin, roll, barmcake or bun)

Although controversial, I quite like to have

My hash browns swapped out for some chips

But scatter no rosemary upon the top

Or they shall not be passing my lips!

A sausage that’s simple and meaty

For breakfasting roles can’t be beat

Please don’t use Lincolnshire or Cumberland 

I do not want herbs in my meat

I don’t want snipped chives sprinkled on my fried egg

Or chopped parsley framing the scene

It’s almost as bad as one’s toast being spread

Not with butter, but cheap margarine 

Tarragon should be gone from my mushrooms 

Basil is banned from my beans

It’s oregaNO for my grilled tomato

On my breakfast, herbs should not be seen

So, please don’t put herbs on my breakfast

It’s not ‘gastro’, not ‘posh’ and not nice

Just ketchup or brown sauce, a dusting of salt

Black pepper’s fine too; it’s a spice

The Artful Splodger

In the hope that these posts are flying under the radar of any psychologists, and thus keeping me out of the padded cell, I bring you number 4 in my Kerner/ Rorschach tribute haiku series:

No. 4

Rorschach blot 04.jpg

Cloaked fox on sofa

Is offered some cowboy boots

By a large housefly


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